Tuesday 11 June 2013
Letter to Aunty Christine
Dear Aunty Christine,
Dear Aunty Christine,
We just wanted to write to let you know how much we enjoyed meeting you for the first time. Thank you for coming and helping mummy to look after us.
We particularly liked the songs you sang and our favourite was the Good Morning Song. Thank you for being so patient with us when we where a little bit upset. We really appreciated your loving and caring voice.
When we are a bit older it will be nice to look at the pictures that you took of us together and of our special walks around the lake. We promise to learn lots of things to show you before we see you next time. Mummy tells us that we will be able to see you And hear you through the computer screen, that will be nice. We are sad that we won't be able to have cuddles but we will save them all up for when we see you next.
Also thank you for helping to look after our mummy by making sure she had some nice food to eat and helping keep the house clean and tidy and giving her lots of good advice.
Mummy and Daddy say you can stay at our house whenever you like and we hope you do as we are going to get bigger and need to play games with our Aunty, uncle and cousins.
We love you lots and lots and can't wait to create even more special memories in the future. Cuddles and kisses Bailey and Blake.
Tuesday 4 June 2013
First day on our own
First day on our own
After a fabulous few weeks as a new family it was time for Mike to go back to work and for me to attempt looking after the twins solo. Having managed on my own on numerous occasions the last few weeks for up to 6 hours I had been led into a false sense of security.
Bailey and Blake had become slightly more demanding over the last week which had been partly due to a feeding issue with Bailey which meant I was feeding them both every 3 hrs and expressing for top up feeds in between every feed.
So right on cue just as the front door closed behind Mike we had simultaneous crying, followed by Blake and then Bailey filling their pants within 10 seconds of each other. Changing their nappies didn't stop the screaming so I positioned them both on the bed where I could reach both of them. It then occurred to me that I hadn't heard Merlot the puppy since Mike had left the house. This was unusual as he normally follows me everywhere. I was concerned he may have got out. So In the middle of all the screams I quickly ran downstairs to check. I found Merlot sitting on the rug having a good chew of my breast pump. Disaster! It was ruined. This warranted a quick call to Mike who couldn't have left more than 15 minutes before to tell him how terrible everything was and how the breast pump issue needed to be sorted ASAP. At this point I still have 2 screaming babies and Blake was so red in the face I was concerned for his emotional stability later in life. So I decided to attempt the tandem feed. It was a success and finally we had restored silence if only temporarily. Wow this was going to be hard.
After the feed it was very difficult to settle Blake I was putting it down to his emotionally upsetting morning. Then he did another poo for me but this time it escaped his nappy, went all over his baby grow and all over the nice white blanket he was wrapped in.
All of this had come after I had been awake since 1.45 and perhaps managed another 30minutes sleep before my day fully started.
A day like this had me considering my choice not to get any help and it was a serious topic of conversation when Mike finally returned from work that evening. At which time I was pacing the floors with 2 babies in arms and had been for 2 hours. My wrists where killing me and I could have fallen to sleep on the spot.
If your thinking it can't be that bad because she has time to write a blog post. I just want to make you aware that I began writing this 3 days ago whilst attempting another tandem feed.
Friday 24 May 2013
Placenta Smoothie
Since my last post a few people have asked me about my placenta smoothie so I thought I would share with you what this consisted of.
My reaction on hearing about this 'trend' of consuming your placenta postpartum was probably much the same as yours will be whilst reading this post. But after considering the potential benefits and doing a fair bit of research I decided to go for it as it couldn't hurt.
I adopted the services of a lovely lady called Elizabeth from a company called Dubai Doula's www.dubaidoulas.com. Put simply Elizabeth comes to pick up your placenta or in my case placenta's from the hospital soon after the birth she then takes some of the placenta and mixes it with anything you like to make a tasty smoothie, I had mixed berries, coconut water and a bit of manuka honey. With the rest of the placenta she dehydrates it and makes capsules which you then take postpartum.
The idea is that the consumption of your placenta ensures you don't have the hormonal imbalances that many experience after birth. Some of the benefits reported are, no baby blues or post natal depression, no postpartum hair loss, quicker recovery after a c section and more energy. I certainly feel that they have helped me. I don't feel that I have had any depression in fact I've been on top of the world since they have arrived. Although sometimes I am obviously tired I have also been shocked at how much energy I have after so little sleep. 9 days after my C section I feel great and would hardly know I had a major operation. Of course this could all be down to the placebo effect but who cares it worked for me.
Introducing Our precious babies Bailey & Blake
Wow what an amazing week. I am delighted to share that on the 15th of May 2013, Mike and I welcomed our twin babies into the world. Bailey Ann Beckett weighting a very healthy 7lbs and Blake George Beckett weighting an also Healthy 6lbs.
The experience of getting to know them this last week has been more wonderful than I could have ever imagined. I really do love them both more than I thought possible and it grows ever day.
Here is their birth story. We where booked in for C-section on 13th of May 2015 and where counting down the days until their arrival. I couldn't wait to see them but also not to be pregnant any more. I grew massively in the last 2 weeks of pregnancy and everything was so uncomfortable. I was on complete bed rest and felt guilty for doing so much as visiting the kitchen to make a cup of tea. my breathing was quite laboured and I had to catch my breath after doing a simple task like turning over in bed.
So on the day before we where due to get the babies out we where very excited. Mike commented on it being like Christmas Eve when you where 6. Unfortunately, on the morning of the 12th we where informed that the nicu of the hospital we where to deliver in (City hospital ) was closed and therefore the operation had been cancelled until further notice. This was bad news for us but we had to keep things in perspective and wish all those tiny babies in the nicu a quick recovery. We went to visit out truly amazing doctor,
Dr Amir Nasseri and he gave us the options. Due to some risk factors of keeping the twins in my tummy any longer he did not want to wait a week to get them out at the hospital we had planned. So we could either swap doctors and swap hospitals or we where given the option of going to a brand new hospital which had only been open 3 months and our doctor would get an emergency licence so that he could deliver there. I was not prepared to loose my wonderful doctor at this stage, I have been seeing him regularly for the last 18months and I really believe he is one of the best. The way he handled this situation also went above and beyond what you would expect of any doctor. He made sure we felt comfortable, sorted out our insurance company who where not fully covering the new hospital choice and did his research and picked his A team for the operation. I was worried about delivering in the new hospital we would be the 11th and 12th babies delivered there and the first set of twins. The equipment in the hospital is state of the art and no expense had been spared but to me it was much more important that the people operating this equipment had practiced and where competent.
All was set and we had booked the Caesarian for 4pm on 15th of May, I didn't get too excited as we had already experienced things didn't always go to plan. So I told 3 people that we had a confirmed time and we went to the hospital.
Once I was in my room in the hospital I started to get excited surely it would go ahead now. Mike and i waited in my room and before we knew it I was being taken down to theatre. Mike went off to get scrubbed up and I was wheeled into theatre. I heard Dr Amir and felt much happier. I was given a spinal block and as my legs started to go tingly and numb mike was called in and the cutting began. As mike walked into room we heard a nurse say 'ut oh', Dr
Amir said sternly to her no 'ut oh' in the operating theatre. We don't know what that was about and don't care to know.
As the operation progressed I felt lots of pulling and tugging and as they pushed the babies out of my tummy some real breath taking moments as they must have been pushing hard down on my lungs to release the twins. Dr Amir pulled Bailey out and lifted her up to show me. I could only see feet and she was taken to the warmer to be assessed. Blake was born one minute later. they where both assessed for what felt like a whilst but I could hear crying so I wasn't worried. I was anxious to get skin on skin time, they did bring Bailey over and try to put her on me but It was hard with the screen up so it was abandoned. We where told that no need to nicu but they would be taken to special care baby unit for a few hours just to regulate temperature, I tried to say no the best way to regulate temperature was to give them skin on skin with me. But they insisted they take them. To be honest by this stage I was shivering and starting to feel sick from drugs so I know it was better that I get rest in recovery and then see them.
There is so much written about the importance of skin on skin time I did feel a bit bad but then we had plenty of time for that after I had recovered and was back into our own room. When I eventually returned to the room it was still quite unbelievable that I had 2 babies and they where here. That first night we where barely left alone for 10 minutes with people coming in checking on me trying to take blood pressure, give me injections etc. And also help me with feeding, Bailey was a natural at this but Blake took a day to get himself in the swing of things. Doctors where telling us that if he didn't feed he would be topped up with formula or taken to nicu but I was very confident that that wouldn't be necessary, and it wasn't. We also found that some of doctors and nurses where quite keen to take the babies and put them in the nursery. I wasn't keen and felt they where at times shocked that I wanted to keep 2 babies with me all the time.
The day after the operation I felt terrible like I had been sawn in two . I needed 3 people to help me get out of bed. By the end of the day I had managed to walk to the end of the corridor and then the next day I felt a hundred times better and now 8 days after the operation I feel nearly recovered. I may have been lucky and also had some help with some good vitamin supplementation, including placenta smoothie but all in all a c section recovery so far hasn't been as bad as I expected.
4 days after the operation we came home and that's where we have been since blissfully happy with our beautiful son and daughter. totally in awe of their cuteness and loving them more and more every day.
Saturday 11 May 2013
35 week preg pic
At 35 weeks we thought the babies where coming so Mike took a picture of me at what we thought would be the most pregnant I would get. So im being brave and sharing it here. I think I have grown alot in the 2 weeks since this picture was taken, so i will take another picture on the day before the operation to compare.
Pre eclamsia
35 weeks exactly and i go to my wonderful doctor for a standard scan. I have the usual tests, blood pressure (which has been slightly up through pregnancy), weight gain and the test for protein in urine. My blood pressure is high and the nurse tells me that I also have protein in my urine. Not great results but i wasn't expecting them to be a major issue.
I enter the room to see the doctor and my doctor very calmly tells me as i am being scanned that i will be admitted to hospital immediately as i have pre eclamsia. I will be given steroid shots 12 hours apart today and we will take the babies out tomorrow. I can tell that he seems to think whatever is going on is pretty serious and i obligingly sign the consent form and Mike drives me to the hospital around the corner to check in.
I knew I didn't feel very good as I had a very poor sleep the night before along with a headache and nausea. Another 2 signs of pre eclamsia which can be easily dismissed as normal pregnancy signs. I was upset to be having the babies as I had really wanted to get to 36 weeks or my ultimate target of 37 weeks. But 35 weeks isn't too bad for twins and again these are risks that every twin pregnancy carries and many deliver way before they even get this far.
So I settled into the hospital and tried to get some rest whilst Mike went home to collect my things and take Merlot the puppy to our friends house, his holiday home.
I knew that it was very important for me to get some good quality rest if I was to have a c section in the morning so I calmed myself down and tried to relax as much as possible. I was monitored regularly, bloods where taken and the babies heartbeats where monitored every 4 hours. All my stats where improving and I had began to feel much better the longer I stayed. The doctor rang me to say that there was a small chance that we could maybe leave the babies in for a little longer but still to be prepared for the possibility for a c section the following day.
To cut this story short the doctor returned the next day to tell me that we would try to keep them in a little longer. I was to stay in hospital for 2 nights and then be allowed home on strict bed rest which means bed and bathroom only. That's where I am today so i have lots of time on my hands to continue writing. Well for the next 2 days anyway.Ahhhhhhhhhhhh the babies are coming.
The doctor has been very clear with me that pre eclamsia doesn't go away i still have it and it can get worse at any time so i have to be vigilant of symptoms and follow doctors orders which I am happy to do.
Useful links:
www.preeclamsia.org
Dr Amir Nasseri - Obstetrics and gynocology - Specialist in high risk pregnancy
http://www.dhcc.ae/clinic/52/N9NE-Medical-Institute/
I enter the room to see the doctor and my doctor very calmly tells me as i am being scanned that i will be admitted to hospital immediately as i have pre eclamsia. I will be given steroid shots 12 hours apart today and we will take the babies out tomorrow. I can tell that he seems to think whatever is going on is pretty serious and i obligingly sign the consent form and Mike drives me to the hospital around the corner to check in.
I knew I didn't feel very good as I had a very poor sleep the night before along with a headache and nausea. Another 2 signs of pre eclamsia which can be easily dismissed as normal pregnancy signs. I was upset to be having the babies as I had really wanted to get to 36 weeks or my ultimate target of 37 weeks. But 35 weeks isn't too bad for twins and again these are risks that every twin pregnancy carries and many deliver way before they even get this far.
So I settled into the hospital and tried to get some rest whilst Mike went home to collect my things and take Merlot the puppy to our friends house, his holiday home.
I knew that it was very important for me to get some good quality rest if I was to have a c section in the morning so I calmed myself down and tried to relax as much as possible. I was monitored regularly, bloods where taken and the babies heartbeats where monitored every 4 hours. All my stats where improving and I had began to feel much better the longer I stayed. The doctor rang me to say that there was a small chance that we could maybe leave the babies in for a little longer but still to be prepared for the possibility for a c section the following day.
To cut this story short the doctor returned the next day to tell me that we would try to keep them in a little longer. I was to stay in hospital for 2 nights and then be allowed home on strict bed rest which means bed and bathroom only. That's where I am today so i have lots of time on my hands to continue writing. Well for the next 2 days anyway.Ahhhhhhhhhhhh the babies are coming.
The doctor has been very clear with me that pre eclamsia doesn't go away i still have it and it can get worse at any time so i have to be vigilant of symptoms and follow doctors orders which I am happy to do.
Useful links:
www.preeclamsia.org
Dr Amir Nasseri - Obstetrics and gynocology - Specialist in high risk pregnancy
http://www.dhcc.ae/clinic/52/N9NE-Medical-Institute/
The rest of the pregnancy
The rest of this pregnancy has gone much like any other i think. People often ask me what it is like being pregnant with twins but as i have no comparison I really have no idea. I am told that I have twice the hormones, twice the blood flow and twice the weight and am therefore twice as pregnant, but I really couldn't tell you how my experience of pregnancy is any different from anyone expecting one baby.
Of course with all those multiples I also have what is deemed a high risk pregnancy, which has meant many more doctors visits and allot more caution. My doctor asked me to stop working at 27 weeks and go on semi bed rest. This involved doing very little, but I was still allowed to pop to the shops for a quick visit, go for coffee and walk the puppy. Although not ideal from a sanity and financial point of view, I have discovered a love for spending time on my own doing nothing. Which of course I must put behind me in the coming days and develop a new love for never being alone.
I have got to admit that in the past I had romanticised pregnancy as I think many do. I am sure every ones experience is very different. Again I don't want to trivialise the mind boggling amazingness that the human body can grow another human being or two and I am more grateful than I could possibly be that I have been blessed with the opportunity to grow 2 babies at the same time. However, pregnancy is a collection of ailments and I'm really not sure how people can love it so much. I love it when the babies kick and move, that is truly incredible, but when I have sickness, headaches, exhaustion, shortness of breath, rib pain, inability to sleep through the night and carpel tunnel I cant see the attraction. I am shocked when people come and tell me how much they miss being pregnant. All I can imagine is it is the mind playing tricks on them making them forget all these symptoms and the fact that they couldn't enjoy a bottle of red wine of an evening to make themselves feel better.
All in all i do feel i have been very lucky, I haven't had the problems that i know many others have had in both multiple and single pregnancies, heart burn, back pain and swollen ankles. Not to mention the more serious problems that many close to me have experienced. I'm not there yet but I feel very happy to be where I am very close to full term with my twin babies.
Friday 10 May 2013
The first scan
Wednesday October 10th 2012
6weeks and 3 days pregnant
We are both still cautious and waiting to see if the doctor can see a baby in the right place and with a heartbeat. Or maybe more than one as the high HCG test could indicate. On the way to the clinic I wipe 2 eyelashes from Mikes cheek and you can imagine what our wishes where as we both blew them from my thumb.
The doctor detects a baby quickly and quickly turns the sound up so we hear a heartbeat. That was the sound I was waiting for and I'm very happy but a vocal expression doesn't seem appropriate in the tiny room with the doctor and nurse so Mike and I share a smile. I say to the doctor ''only one then'' and he replied ''dont know haven't looked yet''. A few seconds later and ''there is the other one'' we hear another heartbeat and twinshock slowly starts to set in. Although we knew this was a possibility it is still a massive shock. All both of us could say on the way home was "two babies" over and over. I think Mike is more excited by this news than I am at this stage, as i am a little bit more aware of the practicalities of a twin pregnancy, but it doesn't take me long to come around to the idea and begin to love it.
A few days later at 6 weeks and 6 days I start to feel quite sick and this then lasts into about the 14th week of pregnancy. The symptoms and ailments of pregnancy begin but at this stage they are very reassuring that things are ok. I only have a few occasions when I am actually sick once when i am in pain and am driving to the doctors and am very nearly sick down myself. Not a high point.
6weeks and 3 days pregnant
We are both still cautious and waiting to see if the doctor can see a baby in the right place and with a heartbeat. Or maybe more than one as the high HCG test could indicate. On the way to the clinic I wipe 2 eyelashes from Mikes cheek and you can imagine what our wishes where as we both blew them from my thumb.
The doctor detects a baby quickly and quickly turns the sound up so we hear a heartbeat. That was the sound I was waiting for and I'm very happy but a vocal expression doesn't seem appropriate in the tiny room with the doctor and nurse so Mike and I share a smile. I say to the doctor ''only one then'' and he replied ''dont know haven't looked yet''. A few seconds later and ''there is the other one'' we hear another heartbeat and twinshock slowly starts to set in. Although we knew this was a possibility it is still a massive shock. All both of us could say on the way home was "two babies" over and over. I think Mike is more excited by this news than I am at this stage, as i am a little bit more aware of the practicalities of a twin pregnancy, but it doesn't take me long to come around to the idea and begin to love it.
A few days later at 6 weeks and 6 days I start to feel quite sick and this then lasts into about the 14th week of pregnancy. The symptoms and ailments of pregnancy begin but at this stage they are very reassuring that things are ok. I only have a few occasions when I am actually sick once when i am in pain and am driving to the doctors and am very nearly sick down myself. Not a high point.
Finding out that we are pregnant
21st September 2012
Today is the day we find out if I am pregnant or not. We get up early and go for the HCG blood test. After the test we are told we need to wait up to 2 hours for the results. I have already decided that if the result isn't what we want we will be drowning our sorrows at the nearest brunch so I'm keen to get the results as soon as possible. We wait in the clinic at opposite sides of the corridor. I had broken my toe chasing our puppy Merlot the day before so wanted to sit in a comfy seat. The results came through on a fax and the nurse walks to me with a big smile to say "Congratulations you are pregnant'' and shook my hand. Mike and I exchanged a smile and for some reason a crowd forms as the nurse tells me what to do next and when to book a scan. A very different experience from others who are generally in the privacy of their own bathroom ( not that i am complaining or anything but grateful at this stage) The nurse then calls the doctor over to tell him the good news and points out that my HCG levels are very high which is a good sign. We decide to stay cautious about the pregnancy until at least the first scan, we have to wait until the 10th of October which seems like forever away as we have found out about this pregnancy very early, I'm not even 4 weeks pregnant.
In the weeks before the first scan I don't experience any bad symptoms, a bit of light headedness, bloated and tiredness maybe. The 10th of October cant come quick enough.
Today is the day we find out if I am pregnant or not. We get up early and go for the HCG blood test. After the test we are told we need to wait up to 2 hours for the results. I have already decided that if the result isn't what we want we will be drowning our sorrows at the nearest brunch so I'm keen to get the results as soon as possible. We wait in the clinic at opposite sides of the corridor. I had broken my toe chasing our puppy Merlot the day before so wanted to sit in a comfy seat. The results came through on a fax and the nurse walks to me with a big smile to say "Congratulations you are pregnant'' and shook my hand. Mike and I exchanged a smile and for some reason a crowd forms as the nurse tells me what to do next and when to book a scan. A very different experience from others who are generally in the privacy of their own bathroom ( not that i am complaining or anything but grateful at this stage) The nurse then calls the doctor over to tell him the good news and points out that my HCG levels are very high which is a good sign. We decide to stay cautious about the pregnancy until at least the first scan, we have to wait until the 10th of October which seems like forever away as we have found out about this pregnancy very early, I'm not even 4 weeks pregnant.
In the weeks before the first scan I don't experience any bad symptoms, a bit of light headedness, bloated and tiredness maybe. The 10th of October cant come quick enough.
Thursday 9 May 2013
Our fertility journey
This morning whilst laying in bed I commented to Mike that effectively these babies have been in the making or at least on a journey to us since 2010. That's when we decided we wanted to have babies. The whole fertility journey was a roller coaster of emotions that neither of us expected. Here is a quick summary of events:
First major hick up:
July 2011
I found out I was pregnant - Yipee. Just before our prebooked holiday to Thailand. A few days after i had taken a positive pregnancy test and we had done our happy dance around the bedroom we where off on a plane for a lovely holiday in Thailand. Off we went, making all plans of when the baby would be due and talking about all our hopes and dreams. We started the holiday well by going for a short run together every morning. This blissful state was about to be shattered when on the evening of day 3 I started getting very sharp pains in my right hand side which where making it difficult for me to sit down. At first I was able to dismiss this as a symptom of pregnancy, but the pains got worse very quickly. We decided to go back to our hotel room and watch a dvd instead of carry on with our night. I began to suspect something was wrong when we went to collect a dvd and i was crouching in the corner of the shop in pain. On returning to our hotel I started frantically googling what could be wrong and it wasn't long before i had self diagnosed myself with an ectopic pregnancy. Knowing that this is quite a serious condition and even life threatening we decided to go to the doctors first thing in the morning. Although the pain just got worse and worse so at 5am in the morning having had no sleep we ordered a taxi to take us to the nearest hospital that was just over an hour away.
At the hospital we where assessed in A&E and I insisted that they make it a priority to send me the the gynaecologist. As soon as i saw her i was examined and she confirmed my suspicions. I was told it was an emergency as they could see that my fallopian tube had ruptured and i would need emergency surgery. My only option was to have a laproscopy (3 tiny incisions under general anaesthetic) or a full on c section because it was cheaper. Obviously I went for the laproscopic surgery and was in the operating room within an hour. Anyway this story is boring me now, essentially the fallout from the ectopic emotionally was much more than I ever expected it could be. I don't know if that came from the hormones, the general anaesthetic of just the general grief and emotional upset. But it was one of the worst experiences I have ever had to go through and makes me appreciate my current situation so much more.
The following months where very difficult for me and I experienced crying episodes like I have never before and I wasn't sure how to explain them. Nearly all of my closest friends started announcing their own pregnancies which was nothing more to me than terrible timing. I was genuinely very happy for them but each announcement made my own damaged fertility seem a bit worse.
During the following year I went through many different procedures whilst many of my friends went through the joyful experience of growing their babies.The HSG dye test on my fallopian tubes was particularly horrific and confirmed that i had a totally blocked tube thus effecting my fertility. I did 5 months of the ovulation stimulating drug clomid which was definitely a low point. The build up of hopes every month the scheduling of bedroom activity and the certainty that there is no way you could have failed only to be presented with conclusive proof every month that you had to return to square one after spending a small fortune. Not to mention the 3 positive pregnancy tests that ended up being chemical pregnancies or very early miscarriages, these where much easier to get through but still upsetting each time.
July 2012
It was finally time to visit the IVF clinic, yes we could have waited another 6 months or a year and it probably would have happened eventually but the emotional upset and the way your life gets put on hold in every way just incase you are pregnant it allot to handle and allot to live with.
I was very excited about starting IVF and very pleasantly surprised that it wasn't anywhere near as terrible as I had expected it to be. I think the year that ran up to IVF had prepared me well, i was ready for any hormonal difficulties, injections and procedures that followed and importantly Mike was also braced for what we had heard and read could be a very challenging process. It was a pleasant surprise to find that the IVF drugs didn't seem to effect me in any real negative way. The procedures where not very painful and my main emotion was excitement. It definitely helped that I had prepared myself to be as calm and upbeat as possible to go through the process, i was having acupuncture regularly and had been for a few months and i had made sure i wasn't too busy with work so that i could be relaxed during this crucial month. I was extremely well researched on IVF, I had a list as long as my arm of vitamins for us both to take which added to the cost of the procedure. On the very exciting day of embryo transfer we where given the opportunity to try implanting more than one embryo so we literally threw caution to the wind and put 3 embryo's into my uterus. This increased our chance of pregnancy and of course also increased our chance of multiple pregnancy. We had a 42% chance of pregnancy, a 22% chance of a twin pregnancy and a 1/2% chance of a triplet pregnancy. The only one of these outcomes that really scared me was a triplet pregnancy so it was a chance i was willing to take.
At this point I just want to point out I am not trivialising the IVF process. It is an amazing advancement in technology that has given many, many couples the chance to become parents who would otherwise never had the chance. And I know for many people it is so much more difficult than it was for us. We where lucky and it worked first time. If it hadn't I know the emotional fallout would have been very ,very hard to deal with. I'm just trying to summarise the experience that we had and not exaggerate what we experienced.
Ok so now onto the next bit the start of Pregnancy....................
Useful links:
www.conceiveuae.net Dr Pankaj Srivastav
www.wellbeingmedicalcentre.com Dr Lanelle Chapman - Naturopath/Acupuncture
First major hick up:
July 2011
I found out I was pregnant - Yipee. Just before our prebooked holiday to Thailand. A few days after i had taken a positive pregnancy test and we had done our happy dance around the bedroom we where off on a plane for a lovely holiday in Thailand. Off we went, making all plans of when the baby would be due and talking about all our hopes and dreams. We started the holiday well by going for a short run together every morning. This blissful state was about to be shattered when on the evening of day 3 I started getting very sharp pains in my right hand side which where making it difficult for me to sit down. At first I was able to dismiss this as a symptom of pregnancy, but the pains got worse very quickly. We decided to go back to our hotel room and watch a dvd instead of carry on with our night. I began to suspect something was wrong when we went to collect a dvd and i was crouching in the corner of the shop in pain. On returning to our hotel I started frantically googling what could be wrong and it wasn't long before i had self diagnosed myself with an ectopic pregnancy. Knowing that this is quite a serious condition and even life threatening we decided to go to the doctors first thing in the morning. Although the pain just got worse and worse so at 5am in the morning having had no sleep we ordered a taxi to take us to the nearest hospital that was just over an hour away.
At the hospital we where assessed in A&E and I insisted that they make it a priority to send me the the gynaecologist. As soon as i saw her i was examined and she confirmed my suspicions. I was told it was an emergency as they could see that my fallopian tube had ruptured and i would need emergency surgery. My only option was to have a laproscopy (3 tiny incisions under general anaesthetic) or a full on c section because it was cheaper. Obviously I went for the laproscopic surgery and was in the operating room within an hour. Anyway this story is boring me now, essentially the fallout from the ectopic emotionally was much more than I ever expected it could be. I don't know if that came from the hormones, the general anaesthetic of just the general grief and emotional upset. But it was one of the worst experiences I have ever had to go through and makes me appreciate my current situation so much more.
The following months where very difficult for me and I experienced crying episodes like I have never before and I wasn't sure how to explain them. Nearly all of my closest friends started announcing their own pregnancies which was nothing more to me than terrible timing. I was genuinely very happy for them but each announcement made my own damaged fertility seem a bit worse.
During the following year I went through many different procedures whilst many of my friends went through the joyful experience of growing their babies.The HSG dye test on my fallopian tubes was particularly horrific and confirmed that i had a totally blocked tube thus effecting my fertility. I did 5 months of the ovulation stimulating drug clomid which was definitely a low point. The build up of hopes every month the scheduling of bedroom activity and the certainty that there is no way you could have failed only to be presented with conclusive proof every month that you had to return to square one after spending a small fortune. Not to mention the 3 positive pregnancy tests that ended up being chemical pregnancies or very early miscarriages, these where much easier to get through but still upsetting each time.
July 2012
It was finally time to visit the IVF clinic, yes we could have waited another 6 months or a year and it probably would have happened eventually but the emotional upset and the way your life gets put on hold in every way just incase you are pregnant it allot to handle and allot to live with.
I was very excited about starting IVF and very pleasantly surprised that it wasn't anywhere near as terrible as I had expected it to be. I think the year that ran up to IVF had prepared me well, i was ready for any hormonal difficulties, injections and procedures that followed and importantly Mike was also braced for what we had heard and read could be a very challenging process. It was a pleasant surprise to find that the IVF drugs didn't seem to effect me in any real negative way. The procedures where not very painful and my main emotion was excitement. It definitely helped that I had prepared myself to be as calm and upbeat as possible to go through the process, i was having acupuncture regularly and had been for a few months and i had made sure i wasn't too busy with work so that i could be relaxed during this crucial month. I was extremely well researched on IVF, I had a list as long as my arm of vitamins for us both to take which added to the cost of the procedure. On the very exciting day of embryo transfer we where given the opportunity to try implanting more than one embryo so we literally threw caution to the wind and put 3 embryo's into my uterus. This increased our chance of pregnancy and of course also increased our chance of multiple pregnancy. We had a 42% chance of pregnancy, a 22% chance of a twin pregnancy and a 1/2% chance of a triplet pregnancy. The only one of these outcomes that really scared me was a triplet pregnancy so it was a chance i was willing to take.
At this point I just want to point out I am not trivialising the IVF process. It is an amazing advancement in technology that has given many, many couples the chance to become parents who would otherwise never had the chance. And I know for many people it is so much more difficult than it was for us. We where lucky and it worked first time. If it hadn't I know the emotional fallout would have been very ,very hard to deal with. I'm just trying to summarise the experience that we had and not exaggerate what we experienced.
Ok so now onto the next bit the start of Pregnancy....................
Useful links:
www.conceiveuae.net Dr Pankaj Srivastav
www.wellbeingmedicalcentre.com Dr Lanelle Chapman - Naturopath/Acupuncture
Introducing Double Trouble in Dubai
I'm writing this blog as a record for my twin babies for their first year of life. Primarily it is a record for them, but secondly it gives us an opportunity to keep friends and family both near and far updated on our twins and how they develop in the first year. Ill make sure there are lots of pictures and maybe video's to share and I will try to post as often as possible. I've got no idea how life will be after the 13th of May 2013, (lets just hope the number 13 is lucky for us) i'm just going to do my best and try and make it all work.
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